there are times i feel im sex object

i never had a romantic relationship in my entire life. i had sex with strange people before. i feel used. i feel no one can love for who i am. they are there for me for sex. just sex. nothing more.

if only i had this kind of knowledge about life when i was 16. i would not have those memories. there are time i blame myself. why i let them use me for sex? i was innocent, i didn't know how to communicate and i didn"t understand life. why they need to used me?

i hate those memories running in my head. they were past but i cant stop them. i hate this kind of feeling. this is the first time i feel this.