I awas 16...

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I awas 16...

Post  counselor on Mon Sep 03, 2012 1:19 am

Hello to anyone who reads my words!

Well I was 16 when I touched the depths of despair, or as some people say, I touched the very bottom!
The words, in this case, does not help to make the idea ... But since we have nothing else to communicate these, I'll be content.
My life was not very happy. In fact he was not happy at all, but I tried to fix it with what was in my power: the food! I've always been a lover of food, and this was a point in my favor in the case of stress. Having no power to change people, at least I had the power to strafogarmi with sweet and savory! Yeah ... I did not have the power to change people. That was the point! I suffered because of my parents. I suffered because I was not understood. I suffered because I was an only child. I suffered from many things: loneliness, depression and a lot of anxiety.
Also, what helped to increase my humiliation was the fact that what is not found inside, I was searching out. But because I was desperate, I did too bad and then I could not give others the right image of me. Let me explain, having a desperate need for affection, and not being able to feel comfortable at home, then I tried desperately to make me a friend and win me his affection, except that, to the despair, and not being able to wait (I everything at once without thinking that the birth of a sense takes a long time), risultavo clumsy and awkward, a little 'alien ... certainly the fame that I was able to obtain was that of the strange girl!
At home, I was always alone in the afternoons. Until high school, I was assigned to my grandmother, then in high school I was allowed to stay at home, and that's where I decided to stay. Now that I think about it, I do not think it was a good idea. But then I agreed to study, because I studied better if surrounded by silence.
Anyway, I considered my father guilty of my suffering ... realizing over the years, that my mother had a good dose of guilt. If I did not notice right away, it was because she's always been good to stay in the shadows, in fact I have to add that still does all the shadows ...
Going to the point, the conflicts I had with my father derived from the fact that he does not know how to parent. I do not know how to be in contact with children and can not convey affection except through gifts like him! A terrible thing for him is that he easily jumped (and still is) the nerves! E 'extremely atrabiliare! That's why I never thought about my mother. Every day there were discussions and do not ever spent in peace.
I arrived at the age of 16 years. I was not able to make me a friend as I wanted ...
Then all of a sudden ... as the days passed, I became good friends with a classmate. I finally found what I was looking for. And it was even finished that terrible dark period, in spite of my house things were always the same. But thanks to that friendship had grown stronger. More sure of myself. Happier.
At university, I lost this friend. We suffered two full years. It was the period of greatest despair.
But then, I was revived by the love of a profound new knowledge, through which I was able to start from scratch.
Now I have a new life!
A beautiful life!
In short, removing the details ... This was a summary of my life up to 25 years.
Definitely my story will be less tragic stories of many other people .. But I hope I have
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