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Ashamed!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty Ashamed!!!!!!!!!!!!

Post  OscarZero on Thu Dec 18, 2014 7:04 pm

I feel scared to disclose this, and I have never told anyone before, but my brother was convicted as being a child abuser 25 years ago. It throws up all sorts of doubts about my own childhood, my own sexuality, and I'm in constant anxiety that some one will find out and tar me with the same brush. I even feel scared right now that some one might be able to trace me and make it public. It has affected my whole life since - forming relationships, being intimate, loosing faith and love towards my family, becoming more reclusive, even avoiding contact with children - not because I think I might be an abuser too, but because I don't want any accusations should the truth ever be found out. Is it too late to ask for help? Is there any support available for the family of the accused. There seems lots for the victims and their families (and rightly so), and for the offenders (who need serious help), but the family of the offender never used to be considered, and it was so long ago now. I recently thought very strongly, and planned out my suicide, following every point in my plan up to the final point of killing myself. But I changed my mind. I'm trying to sort myself out, but don't know where to go. This is one of a number of issues I'm trying to deal with, but I feel very lost.


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